Embrace Your Magnificence by Fabienne Fredrickson

Author:Fabienne Fredrickson
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Hay House
Published: 2014-07-01T00:00:00+00:00

33. The Elusive Carrot

“Why are some successful people happy and others not? … The happy individuals look at life from one perspective; the unhappy look at life from another.”

—DAN SULLIVAN

We often get in our own way by not recognizing or celebrating our own successes. We forget how much we’ve accomplished or how much abundance we have in our lives because we’re so quick to move on to the next thing. Some people go so far as to focus obsessively on the 2 percent that’s not going well, as opposed to putting their attention on the 98 percent that is going well.

Keeping your focus on what’s new and good, as well as on what you have accomplished, is important because it gives you a feeling of confidence. It becomes proof that if you were able to do one thing, then surely you can do another. It requires that you acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments, significant and otherwise. But for many people, this is easier said than done.

One of the exercises I share with my clients is the Elusive Carrot concept. Imagine that you have a headband on, and there is a long stick strapped to it, hanging right out in front of you about a yard. Next, imagine that at the end of that stick is a carrot. The carrot is your goal in life, or something big that you really want. It’s the nature of things, human nature, that as you go forward toward that goal (the carrot), the carrot advances by the same amount, every time.

When we accomplish something, most of us forget to celebrate. And so we also forget to acknowledge our hard work or the great things we have, focusing instead on what we don’t have yet. When you measure your accomplishments against the ideal, that Elusive Carrot, you never feel satisfied. It’s never good enough, no matter how hard you’ve worked or how much you’ve accomplished.

Therefore, you’re never good enough. When you measure your accomplishments by looking forward to the always-advancing ideal, you always fall short. This creates feelings of disappointment, depression, hopelessness, frustration, and resentment.

But really, this is just a matter of perspective. If I were to ask you to measure your successes another way, your feelings could change instantaneously. Instead of measuring forward, begin to measure backward. Look at where you were a year ago or ten years ago. List exactly where you were then. List where you are now. The likelihood is you’ve made much progress.

How has your life improved in the past 12 months?

What do you do easily now that you once thought was impossible?

What have you accomplished this year that you couldn’t have accomplished three years ago?

What is one outcome you experienced this year that would have been inconceivable before?

What are your results this year, compared with your results last year at this time?

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